Reflect On Your Sins You Brought Youself Into(!)
By
Joseph Alleine
Oh! I see my heart has deceived me all this while, in flattering me that my condition was good.
I see, I see, I am but a lost and undone man, forever undone, unless the Lord helps me out of this condition.
My sins! My sins! Lord, what an unclean, polluted wretch I am! More loathsome and odious to You than the most hateful venom or repulsive carcass can be to me.
Oh! What a hell of sin is in this heart of mine, which I have flattered myself to be a good heart!
Lord, how universally am I corrupted, in all my parts, powers, performances!
All the imaginations of my heart are only evil continually.
I am under an inability to, and aversion from, and an enmity against anything that is good; and am prone to all that is evil.
My heart is a very sink of sin: and oh the innumerable hosts and swarms of sinful thoughts, words and actions that have flowed from it!
Oh the load of guilt that is on my soul!
My head is full, and my heart is full; my mind and my members, they are all full of sin.
Oh my sins! How do they stare upon me!
Woe is me, my creditors are upon me: every commandment takes hold upon me, for more than ten thousand talents, yes, ten thousand times ten thousand.
How endless then is the sum of all my debts!
If this whole world were filled up from earth to heaven with paper, and all this paper written over within and without by arithmeticians—yet, when all were added up, it would come inconceivably short of what I owe to the least of God’s commandments.
Woe unto me, for my debts are infinite, and my sins are increased.
They are wrongs to an infinite Majesty, and if he who commits treason against an earthly king is worthy to be racked, drawn and quartered; what have I deserved that have so often lifted up my hand against Heaven, and have struck at the crown and dignity of the Almighty?
Borrowed from